I simply do not know any other way than to function while feeling empty. It’s how it has always been. Occasionally I pause and scream into the void, but then I just keep going. I don’t know how. I just do.
Yes, and people applaud that, that drive of never giving up. Why do people cheer and hail and glorify the hustle, and don't forget the side hustle, rather than encourage and support mental health and rest? The bone-weariness among us all is wreaking havoc upon our mind, body, and soul.
I've been feeling this a lot over the last couple years in customer service. Most never got a break and people are wondering why nobody wants these jobs anymore. Feeling the stress of public everyday for 2 years on top of your own wears you down. And now I'm finally in a job that expects less of me and makes me more happy but I still find myself unconsciously thinking I should be doing more. I hate how embedded it is. But I'm truly trying to stop and be grateful for where I am and soak in the slowing down before the holidays kick into gear.
I think of this a lot when people complain about 'how no one wants to work any more'. Because so many jobs are awful! And pay so little. Truly intolerable. And I agree, it takes time to recover. The nervous system has to adjust.
Gosh I cannot imagine working long in that world. My last job in that realm was when I was in high school, and even then it exhausted me on a level I cannot even articulate.
We seem to think about “the butterfly effect” often and not ruffling feathers.
Maybe it’s time to ruffle some feathers in our worlds and change the air patterns that the butterfly wings beat upon and maybe effect some positive change in our worlds.
Let’s all start a fire 🔥 (cuz I know how much Tyler likes fire) and make a difference to soothe us and others in turn!
Amen. As I write this, I'm sitting outside, where I can hear the crickets, a raven, the wind in the maples. And it's enough.
This is my journey the past 3 years. From "Total Work" (Andrew J Taggart) to letting the soft animal of my body love what it loves (Mary Oliver).
Enough is enough - in every way. If we have enough, we have enough and we don't need more.
This whole thing is fractal. The pursuit of more, the side-hustle, the burning of the candle, the consumption - it's what's killing us individually and killing our life-support systems. Drops of cortisone poisoning our bodies and poisoning the planet.
We are enough as we are. We are part of the world. We have a role to play as a part of everything that is.
I appreciate how you open on tuning in to 'enough' through listening to what's present in the air around you. And I also want to admit, I'm a little jealous you have such enriching nature sounds to tune into! I live close to a 4-lane major North/South street in our city and I get a lot of road noise, especially when going to sleep! Not so soothing, LOL.
Tyler, this is so spot on. Deeply relatable. I don’t have great advice since I’m one of the running on empty humans, but I see all of you who feel the same and honor your journeys, hoping we all find a better way. 🖤
I love this one, thank you for writing and sharing it. This brought up a memory for me. I had the good fortune of seeing HHDalai Lama in Seattle many years ago. At the end of his four day stay there was a big televised gathering at a stadium where people could ask him questions live. Not surprisingly, one of the questions submitted was, "what can each of us do to promote world peace?" With just a brief pause, HHDL's answer was, "I think if each of us would sleep for eight hours a night, we would be well on our way". And I just love it so much that he gave that answer. And yet....I'm sure we in this room could make a long list of the people for whom sleeping 8 hours a night is not even an option. The husband/caregiver of his wife with severe dementia. Incarcerated people. People with chronic insomnia. The single mother of five children working three part time jobs. Etc. Although it can be hard to figure out, I do think getting enough sleep is a large part of the answer, and if I'm able to do that, I need to reach out and help my neighbor do that. And eventually...world peace. : )
Jen I am so jealous of you getting to see HH. My goodness. I was asked to read a poem at his birthday party a few years back, on his request, the greatest honor of my life, and then the party got canceled for security reasons, so I was unable to do so. His answer is such profound truth, wrapped in such simple honesty. I LOVE this story. Thank you.
I believe you have to somewhat make some time for yourself. I believe this is a very important in the life we all live. Whatever you're going thru. Get away from all the noise, stress, Social Media, just sit. And whether it's reading, breathing/ meditating, whatever it may be. Just sit and just be. Take in your surroundings... I'm just typing as I go here, but I love reading. I also love writing; somehow it takes away whatever "thoughts" and stress in my mind racing and puts them out.
YES YES YES Taylor. Preach this everywhere. WE MUST take the time for ourselves. Take in Everything. Beautiful advice. Thank you, as always, for being here.
For me I feel lucky that I found my current job during the pandemic - wherein I'm working as a nurse in a residential facility for the abandoned and neglected elderly. Trust me, it's no sunshines and rainbows especially during those times when we lose a few them. But the fulfillment that I get in every moment that I spend with them makes it all worth it. Knowing that those moments that I made them smile and laugh will be one of the last memories that they will ever have fills my own depleting cup. Honestly, the pain of losing them still hits me hard and drains me out, but I wouldn't trade it for anything else. Because it is where I learned to cherish and appreciate more each moment that I have with my loved ones.
I recently read “Eat Pray Love” by Elizabeth Gilbert ( yes, I am late to the party) and your post made me connect to a couple of the ideas. Those who are familiar with the book or movie know that she travels to Italy, India and Indonesia. One thing that struck me about her experiences in Italy is when an Italian tells her that they, in contrast to Americans, are masters of doing nothing- and that this is the goal of all work. North Americans don’t feel like they have permission to let go and enjoy pleasure. When asked, ‘How are you?’, how often do we respond, “So busy,” like it is a badge of honour? I wonder if we have trouble getting off the treadmill because we are afraid of being perceived negatively? When the author travels to India and endeavours to learn to quiet her mind through meditation, a monk tells her that she needs to go to the “silence of the heart”. Sort of like what Simon was saying in an earlier response here. I guess the question is, where is that for you? I am lucky enough to live in a place where I can easily access forested areas or a beach. It might not be nature for you. Like Taylor says, you have to make time for yourself however you can in your life. If you’re not sure what it is that soothes you, you have to try to find it. Because yes, then it’s just stress and what’s the point?
I'm sending out a collective hug for us all. It's often an exhausting world we have for ourselves. But a big collective hug can do a bit of wonder (if you're up for it). ❤🤗
In situations I get hit by the big tired, I go back to basics, and back to nature. Being in a fortunate enough situation, with a job paying my bills, I wonder where the ease is for the less fortunate. I always try to minimise, give away, reduce material belongings. What with those that need all they have and more? If tired is my problem, what about people who can't even afford the feeling. I can't think about myself, without trying to compare with them.
This is why I need art. Music. Films. Poetry. My journal and a pen. These things fuel me beyond belief. When I am feeling completely empty, anxious, overwhelmed, defeated...I put on my favorite music and grab a book. Write a poem. It may not solve all of life's problems, but it always gives me the energy I need to keep going. Always.
I simply do not know any other way than to function while feeling empty. It’s how it has always been. Occasionally I pause and scream into the void, but then I just keep going. I don’t know how. I just do.
So true. We just do what we gotta do, given the conditions we are living with. I love your honesty. And, I'm sorry, that sounds rough.
Don't we all, when at our lowest we keep on keeping on. So accustomed to this, we are.
Yes, and people applaud that, that drive of never giving up. Why do people cheer and hail and glorify the hustle, and don't forget the side hustle, rather than encourage and support mental health and rest? The bone-weariness among us all is wreaking havoc upon our mind, body, and soul.
I've been feeling this a lot over the last couple years in customer service. Most never got a break and people are wondering why nobody wants these jobs anymore. Feeling the stress of public everyday for 2 years on top of your own wears you down. And now I'm finally in a job that expects less of me and makes me more happy but I still find myself unconsciously thinking I should be doing more. I hate how embedded it is. But I'm truly trying to stop and be grateful for where I am and soak in the slowing down before the holidays kick into gear.
I think of this a lot when people complain about 'how no one wants to work any more'. Because so many jobs are awful! And pay so little. Truly intolerable. And I agree, it takes time to recover. The nervous system has to adjust.
Gosh I cannot imagine working long in that world. My last job in that realm was when I was in high school, and even then it exhausted me on a level I cannot even articulate.
You nailed it Tyler... nothing soothes.
What I wouldn’t give for something that did. Ponder on...
Something will, I promise you this. We just have to give ourselves the room to feel it.
Curious...if “nothing soothes”
can “anything” soothe?
We seem to think about “the butterfly effect” often and not ruffling feathers.
Maybe it’s time to ruffle some feathers in our worlds and change the air patterns that the butterfly wings beat upon and maybe effect some positive change in our worlds.
Let’s all start a fire 🔥 (cuz I know how much Tyler likes fire) and make a difference to soothe us and others in turn!
☸️
Nothing soothes, anything soothes. Buddhist koan. I LOVE the idea of soothing each other. Isn't that the whole point.
Amen. As I write this, I'm sitting outside, where I can hear the crickets, a raven, the wind in the maples. And it's enough.
This is my journey the past 3 years. From "Total Work" (Andrew J Taggart) to letting the soft animal of my body love what it loves (Mary Oliver).
Enough is enough - in every way. If we have enough, we have enough and we don't need more.
This whole thing is fractal. The pursuit of more, the side-hustle, the burning of the candle, the consumption - it's what's killing us individually and killing our life-support systems. Drops of cortisone poisoning our bodies and poisoning the planet.
We are enough as we are. We are part of the world. We have a role to play as a part of everything that is.
Sit still and know this and we will be OK.
Sit still and now that I am.
I appreciate how you open on tuning in to 'enough' through listening to what's present in the air around you. And I also want to admit, I'm a little jealous you have such enriching nature sounds to tune into! I live close to a 4-lane major North/South street in our city and I get a lot of road noise, especially when going to sleep! Not so soothing, LOL.
Your opening line is stunning, and so much what I love. If we have enough we have enough. Beautifully put my friend.
Tyler, this is so spot on. Deeply relatable. I don’t have great advice since I’m one of the running on empty humans, but I see all of you who feel the same and honor your journeys, hoping we all find a better way. 🖤
Maybe, just maybe, if we all band together, we'll figure something beautiful out.
I love this one, thank you for writing and sharing it. This brought up a memory for me. I had the good fortune of seeing HHDalai Lama in Seattle many years ago. At the end of his four day stay there was a big televised gathering at a stadium where people could ask him questions live. Not surprisingly, one of the questions submitted was, "what can each of us do to promote world peace?" With just a brief pause, HHDL's answer was, "I think if each of us would sleep for eight hours a night, we would be well on our way". And I just love it so much that he gave that answer. And yet....I'm sure we in this room could make a long list of the people for whom sleeping 8 hours a night is not even an option. The husband/caregiver of his wife with severe dementia. Incarcerated people. People with chronic insomnia. The single mother of five children working three part time jobs. Etc. Although it can be hard to figure out, I do think getting enough sleep is a large part of the answer, and if I'm able to do that, I need to reach out and help my neighbor do that. And eventually...world peace. : )
Jen I am so jealous of you getting to see HH. My goodness. I was asked to read a poem at his birthday party a few years back, on his request, the greatest honor of my life, and then the party got canceled for security reasons, so I was unable to do so. His answer is such profound truth, wrapped in such simple honesty. I LOVE this story. Thank you.
Awwwww....by invitation! how sweet, and so sorry it got cancelled. Sounds like he has been touched by your beautiful poetry though.
I believe you have to somewhat make some time for yourself. I believe this is a very important in the life we all live. Whatever you're going thru. Get away from all the noise, stress, Social Media, just sit. And whether it's reading, breathing/ meditating, whatever it may be. Just sit and just be. Take in your surroundings... I'm just typing as I go here, but I love reading. I also love writing; somehow it takes away whatever "thoughts" and stress in my mind racing and puts them out.
Tyler, love this Signal Fire. --As always.
YES YES YES Taylor. Preach this everywhere. WE MUST take the time for ourselves. Take in Everything. Beautiful advice. Thank you, as always, for being here.
For me I feel lucky that I found my current job during the pandemic - wherein I'm working as a nurse in a residential facility for the abandoned and neglected elderly. Trust me, it's no sunshines and rainbows especially during those times when we lose a few them. But the fulfillment that I get in every moment that I spend with them makes it all worth it. Knowing that those moments that I made them smile and laugh will be one of the last memories that they will ever have fills my own depleting cup. Honestly, the pain of losing them still hits me hard and drains me out, but I wouldn't trade it for anything else. Because it is where I learned to cherish and appreciate more each moment that I have with my loved ones.
THANK YOU for the work you are doing. How vital, how heartbreaking. You're amazing.
I recently read “Eat Pray Love” by Elizabeth Gilbert ( yes, I am late to the party) and your post made me connect to a couple of the ideas. Those who are familiar with the book or movie know that she travels to Italy, India and Indonesia. One thing that struck me about her experiences in Italy is when an Italian tells her that they, in contrast to Americans, are masters of doing nothing- and that this is the goal of all work. North Americans don’t feel like they have permission to let go and enjoy pleasure. When asked, ‘How are you?’, how often do we respond, “So busy,” like it is a badge of honour? I wonder if we have trouble getting off the treadmill because we are afraid of being perceived negatively? When the author travels to India and endeavours to learn to quiet her mind through meditation, a monk tells her that she needs to go to the “silence of the heart”. Sort of like what Simon was saying in an earlier response here. I guess the question is, where is that for you? I am lucky enough to live in a place where I can easily access forested areas or a beach. It might not be nature for you. Like Taylor says, you have to make time for yourself however you can in your life. If you’re not sure what it is that soothes you, you have to try to find it. Because yes, then it’s just stress and what’s the point?
I HATE the "cult of busy-ness" So much. It breaks my heart and makes me want to run so far from it.
I'm sending out a collective hug for us all. It's often an exhausting world we have for ourselves. But a big collective hug can do a bit of wonder (if you're up for it). ❤🤗
I'll take it! Thank you!
In situations I get hit by the big tired, I go back to basics, and back to nature. Being in a fortunate enough situation, with a job paying my bills, I wonder where the ease is for the less fortunate. I always try to minimise, give away, reduce material belongings. What with those that need all they have and more? If tired is my problem, what about people who can't even afford the feeling. I can't think about myself, without trying to compare with them.
Beautiful viewpoint, and beautiful plan.
This is why I need art. Music. Films. Poetry. My journal and a pen. These things fuel me beyond belief. When I am feeling completely empty, anxious, overwhelmed, defeated...I put on my favorite music and grab a book. Write a poem. It may not solve all of life's problems, but it always gives me the energy I need to keep going. Always.